Straits Times - Devastated after being rejected by three schools for DSA: How to help your child cope

[Jamesc]

So now can throw the erhu away.

[RadX]

On 9/2/2024 at 4:41 PM, Jamesc said:

So now can throw the erhu away.

Or buy byd at to and play erhu in the car.. without the erhu 😂

[Jamesc]

Wisdom of the Arabs

The second biggest insult is may the flees of a thousand camels infect the armpits of your enemy and he has arms too short to scratch.

The worse insult and guaranteed to make your enemy suffer and doomed to a life a misery is may your enemy get everything he wants and when he wants it. 

[Jamesc]

Why choose erhu if the kids doesn't like it?

If I was a school kid again I would choose art.

I love drawing naked ladies

and I can spend hours practicing.

Edited September 2 by Jamesc

[Tianmo]

DSA is not a passport to wherever you want to be. End of the day, the school will still look at academic performance of P4 to mid year of P6, including other factors like team player, leadership, etc via the interviews. Some slots may be awarded to those might miss the cut by a slight margin if base on merits alone base on known results, but show potential and are very keen. 

It is also not surprise that through interviews, school can tell if you applied to many other schools, and they know that giving you that slot may not result in you accepting the offer. Some with good results has no problem coming back by merits if the child is really interested.

I have my share of experience in DSA to SST, SSP,  Fu Hua, NUSH and poly EAE later, which is kind of similar , and I can say all of them looked at different requirements.  

A few points I read from the article. 

The boy, who was selected to join the school’s Chinese Orchestra co-curricular activity in Primary 1, initially cried about having to go for lessons, but eventually committed to them and took yearly exams.

Why was the boy selected in P1? CCA usually starts in P2 voluntarily, and becomes compulsory in P3?  If he had been interested, why did he cry when selected?

 

Ms Chong, 45, a housewife, says she did not consider DSA seriously initially, but started doing so when her son was encouraged by his teachers to apply for it in upper primary.

This is where teachers can really F things up with their remarks. I have the experience with a PE teacher telling my son he can run and sld consider DSA to SSP, and it F up all our planning for DSA to SST. Luckily 祖先保佑, and everything worked according to our plan. So I feel that teachers sld speak with parents first before telling that child he/she sld do this or that. 

 

“I thought he was gifted in this area, so I put in effort for him. After spending money and time on lessons, I thought it was a sure thing to get into a school via DSA,” Ms Chong says.

Assumption kills. This sound more like a parent asking for return on investment, assuming put in something sure must get back something. Wise? 

 

To maximise his chances, she chose schools with different cut-off points: an affiliated school, a co-ed school and a neighbourhood school.

“We went for a wide range of schools so that one of them would accept him, no matter his results,” she says.

is she trying to get him into a school or is she trying to get him into the school of choice? "No matter his results" sound kind of strange to me. Is like telling me his results are not very optimistic, and DSA is an escape route. 

 

“He was upset and did not want to talk about it, but I’m glad he eventually took it in his stride,” says Ms Chong, who adds that he has stopped playing the erhu.

If the boy really love the erhu, he will not stop playing it. That's what I have seen in many talented individuals who really love their talents. With or without DSA usually they will push on. Why did he stopped playing? Maybe he wasn't really interested in the first place, but it gave him the idea that DSA can cover poor grades?

Apart from teachers, parents play the biggest role in a child's DSA, from planning to acceptance/ rejection. If parents themselves are so emotionally affected, what do you think of the child?  

DSA is not for everyone, and DSA to different schools has different requirements and different schools look for different students. Need to do some homework one, but no need to carry balls and do volunteer work lah, that one maybe primary school admissions.

 

 

 

 

Edited September 2 by Tianmo

[Tianmo]

On 9/2/2024 at 4:26 PM, Lala81 said:

I think she mentioned that she applied to different tiers of schools. So it's like safety net 3rd choice also didn't work out. 

 

That's the strange part to me. 

 

[Tianmo]

On 9/2/2024 at 7:49 AM, Jman888 said:

hahaha... I know a family where the boy made it to sport school via DSA with his CCA, after spending 1 month in the boarding sch during the December holiday and when the school open for a week or two, he decided to quit, quickly reapply to a normal sec sch. 

 

It's the closest you can get to NS liao, and not everyone can tahan that kind of lifestyle. I think it's lights off at 10.30pm now, not like can suka suka order grab food at 2am hor.  

 

[Si4dr]

On 9/2/2024 at 9:54 AM, Jman888 said:

aiya wasted, if not she could be the next one like her

Air rifle needs 2 hand to hold la...cannot chu pattern 😀

I did asked her whether she regretted when watching Paris Olympics and she didn't. 😅

[Sosaria]

On 9/2/2024 at 12:26 PM, yishunite said:

You said yours is multiple Ks then times by several parents ends up also $40-50k no? This sounds like needs clarification of guidelines. Your "teacher" got clear conflict of interest taking money to "coach" DSA applicant

Very often the coach runs a training school outside and guess what , maybe extra training session got to sign up with his school. I am sure if you are parents of DSA kids in performance cca like dance, you may know this kind of arrangements. Even when in the cca, there are extra costs involved. How is this a level playing field for lower income?

Clear conflict of interest.

Glad that all the skeletons are tumbling out of the closet finally.

Again, DSA is a great idea that fail at the implementation level. Not enough monitoring and questioning. "Just arrow someone to do"

Edited September 3 by Sosaria

[Heartlander]

On 9/3/2024 at 3:34 PM, Sosaria said:

Very often the coach runs a training school outside and guess what , maybe extra training session got to sign up with his school. I am sure if you are parents of DSA kids in performance cca like dance, you may know this kind of arrangements. Even when in the cca, there are extra costs involved. How is this a level playing field for lower income?

Clear conflict of interest.

Glad that all the skeletons are tumbling out of the closet finally.

Again, DSA is a great idea that fail at the implementation level. Not enough monitoring and questioning. "Just arrow someone to do"

I understand what you talking about. But at ground level, the cost might not be as significant as what many thinking.

For my girl's case, the music instrument lessons and cost of extra sport lessons are less than paying tuition fees for one school subject (and at mid-tier tiution centre level), so not really that much at the end of the day. I understand if the cost is high then definitely a concern, but think most of these coaches are not that stupid to flout the rules blatantly. 

And of course there will be black sheeps lah. I would think those who thinking of DSA are mostly not from lower income type, else would not even bother to do it.

[Sosaria]

On 9/3/2024 at 5:28 PM, Heartlander said:

I understand what you talking about. But at ground level, the cost might not be as significant as what many thinking.

For my girl's case, the music instrument lessons and cost of extra sport lessons are less than paying tuition fees for one school subject (and at mid-tier tiution centre level), so not really that much at the end of the day. I understand if the cost is high then definitely a concern, but think most of these coaches are not that stupid to flout the rules blatantly. 

And of course there will be black sheeps lah. I would think those who thinking of DSA are mostly not from lower income type, else would not even bother to do it.

If I recall, DSA was always touted as a leveller.

The prevailing thought was that measuring a student via academic results alone, the higher income group would have advantage due to them being able to afford tuition and extra classes.

Well as it turns out, music, dance, art, sports, all need "tuition" outside too  And may prove more costly (add in grading exam fees) than academic subject tuition.

Made the inequality situation worse...

Anecdotal evidence, long ago in our generation, studying hard can get one into a brand name school through excellent psle results. My spouse herself went this route despite hailing from blue collar family that don't speak english but value education.

But nowadays you see these brand name schools are mainly filled with privileged kids, getting in through all kinds of direct schemes.

So did our system improve or become worse with all these changes since then??

Edited September 3 by Sosaria

[Heartlander]

On 9/3/2024 at 6:14 PM, Sosaria said:

If I recall, DSA was always touted as a leveller.

The prevailing thought was that measuring a student via academic results alone, the higher income group would have advantage due to them being able to afford tuition and extra classes.

Well as it turns out, music, dance, art, sports, all need "tuition" outside too  And may prove more costly (add in grading exam fees) than academic subject tuition.

Made the inequality situation worse...

Anecdotal evidence, long ago in our generation, studying hard can get one into a brand name school through excellent psle results. My spouse herself went this route despite hailing from blue collar family that don't speak english but value education.

But nowadays you see these brand name schools are mainly filled with privileged kids, getting in through all kinds of direct schemes.

So did our system improve or become worse with all these changes since then??

My apologies I do not want to indulge in sob stories to prove some points. What I can share is that my background is definitely not elite, and this DSA thingy had allowed my girl to enter a school which she could not have entered due to academic grades (PSLE points failed by a few points eventually). In her primary school, my family income level should be quite low judging by the type of cars many of her classmates owned, so in a way her story has proven that this DSA is indeed a leveller for her to have better life. 

We do not need to drag in all the blue collar poor families as most likely the kids would not be interested in studies, not all of them of course. And most likely focsuing on studies instead of using CCA to get to better schools. There are other paths mapped out for them by the government and we should appreciate that these paths are made available now, which were definitely not available during my time. Some online videos from non-Singaporeans who sent their kinds to study here have touted this as one of the main reason why they want their kids to come here study vs what they have back home. We recognised that not every kids will be able to be degree holders, but there are at least paths established for all to be prepared for work. One of my kids fall into this category, and I am definitely not giving up hope for him to have a proper job and raise a family if he put in enough efforts. Anyway I stop at this as no point arguing for the sake of arguing.

I definitely agree that this DSA scheme is far from perfect, and easily abused. But there are definitely merits and many have benefitted from it. We should try to improve the scheme to make it better.

[Krieger]

DSA for my children is basically to reduce the PSLE pressure on them. We are one family who does not believe in getting too stress up for PSLE on the kids. When we choose the schools for DSAs, we make sure the school chosen were around their academic standards. In fact, we choose schools that requires a lower standard. 

Also, why we decided to go this route is because the kids got gold for those Olympiads. We do not even prep them for those so-called tests done in schools during P5. We believe if they can make it means they will do so even when they did not attend those courses. In short, we allow nature to take its course. 

We did consider going the international school route but decided not to after doing a check on some statistics. 

In short, what I can share with PSLE parents is that, let the kids enjoy the process of learning. No DSA route, so be it. Choose a school near your home is way more important. 

[Kxbc]

On 9/2/2024 at 4:41 PM, Jamesc said:

So now can throw the erhu away.

should keep. next time no job, just take the erhu and play sad songs by the mrt station and ask for alms. 

the boy is obviously not with the erhu to get through dsa. 

[Heartlander]

Wife shared more after back from a reunion gathering with fellow parents from primary school days just few days ago. The basketball key people like coach and teacher-in-charge all changed already with investigation started about 1 year ago. Latest update is that investigation not concluded yet. The coach named in below article seems related to the basketball coach in that school, with similar accusations hurled. Think a past student came out as whistle blower, being labelled as ungrateful fellow after being given extensive help in his studies and DSA route. Not sure if he was one of the abused student in the article. Really very deep water.

https://www.straitstimes.com/singapore/courts-crime/basketball-coach-who-sexually-abused-4-teen-boys-gets-19-years-jail-caning

[Lala81]

On 9/10/2024 at 1:14 PM, Krieger said:

DSA for my children is basically to reduce the PSLE pressure on them. We are one family who does not believe in getting too stress up for PSLE on the kids. When we choose the schools for DSAs, we make sure the school chosen were around their academic standards. In fact, we choose schools that requires a lower standard. 

Also, why we decided to go this route is because the kids got gold for those Olympiads. We do not even prep them for those so-called tests done in schools during P5. We believe if they can make it means they will do so even when they did not attend those courses. In short, we allow nature to take its course. 

We did consider going the international school route but decided not to after doing a check on some statistics. 

What stats?