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Should men be the sole $$ contributor despite both working?


Icebrush79
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I give my wife an allowance. Not that she needs it, but to allay any insecurities. Anyway she reads my handphone whenever she pleases lol.

Actually that is the part that i really dislike when women stay at home... insecurity and vivid imaginations!

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Actually that is the part that i really dislike when women stay at home... insecurity and vivid imaginations!

Men are from Mars, women are from venus.
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My wife too see my hp as she pleases. I no lock my phone one. Nothing to hide. I always pass her my whole wallet to buy stuff when in food court and supermarket.

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My wife too see my hp as she pleases. I no lock my phone one. Nothing to hide. I always pass her my whole wallet to buy stuff when in food court and supermarket.

My wife once a while will read my posts here as well haha... Though she mostly camps at edmw cos more people lol
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I don't think its being calculative or not. Sure, some may view this as being calculative. 
But practically speaking, this is an issue that nobody loves to talk about before marriage and it comes back and haunt the couple of it is not ironed out in the first place.
 
Some women have the notion of, what you earn is ours, what I earn is mine. My question then is, why do you need to safekeep so much money for?
The whole basis of marriage is that the union is your blanket of security, not the basket of funds you keep for yourself only.
If there is no percieved security in your husband, then don't marry him, simple !
 
Of course, many guys spoil market by having affairs, but I can tell you, women are fast catching up playing this game. 
 
If what I earn is not mine anymore and I have to grovel to wifey just to buy a new set of sports rims, then there is no meaning being married anymore.  

 

 Agree...

I earn more than wifey (almost double her total compensation), so based on ratio 1:2, i pay 70% of everything.

We use joint account for this after calculating how much needed for everything, and have like 1-2k left over every month for little luxuries, so this account is actually growing albeit damn slowly.

 

Exception, my car expenses on me, and hers on her.

But money we made from property investments over the years, remain joint in another account, even though now the account balance is smallish since we paid off the housing loans.   

So we have 2 joint accounts, one active, one for investments, and we maintain separate personal accounts. 

 

This this is great cos i dont get pissed when she buys her mum or her sisters some jewellery/watches for birthdays, and she doesn't wince when i bao $500 ang pao for certain people at weddings, or buy watches.  

I see watch, i can afford, i buy. No need to think so much, just tell her after. 

Think everything will be different if it was coming from joint. 

 

But on this, i used to always 'hear' from my wife; her good friend and hubby's superior financial arrangement, what i call "joint at hips" accounts. 

Both contribute 100% of their salary into joint account.

Wah... no private money to buy rolex or what man.. I mean everything sia

I was holding off on this cos i knew it would lead to many many restrictions..

No watches, no cigar money and constant justifications.. Life will be darker by a shade man.  

 

BUT, the guy had this massive affair and got kid some more... 

After that the constant talk about her friend's superior financial arrangement stopped. Didn't hear a peep...

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My wife god sent one

Contribute money, housework, everything

Me also lah

Haha

Haha mine also...

Cannot do housework and cannot cook... but is ok..

Impt is to click

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You just reminded me why my mental image of you is that of the dirty old men hanging around the bridge in Chinatown. And you do look like them in reality ð

Must be talking from experience.....
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Haha and the worst part is when stopping at traffic lights, people will look into your car and wonder , what's a successful and handsome man like you doing with an elephant - of course since she's in the front seat, people naturally assumes she's your woman ...

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he sometimes hang ard the bridge with me................I hang ard looking at ATBs..............he hang under looking for gays............ [:p]  [laugh]  [laugh]

 

 

those going Ann Siang Hill? :grin:

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I have to say that my relationship with my wife is a lot more traditional in terms of financials even though she is working and taking home around the same amount as me (she used to make more than me in past years).

 

As the husband, I control all the monetary decisions in the household but I leave the purse with her. We have a joint account where we contribute almost all our salary (more on that later) and we both have IB access to the account (I've actually forgotten my password since she is the one that usually logs on). I control the household expenditure as well as my wife's personal expenditure and any purchase above 50$ has to be approved by me. Some might term it abuse (my relatives have said so) but my wife is fine with it and I've actually set this rule down for her benefit. Prior to getting together and getting married, she would often splurge on useless things like spa treatments and 150$ meals. Mind you, that was at a time when we were making below 4k each so I never count understand how she managed to spend 3k plus on a spa package which she has still not fully utilized 4 years down.

 

I set down all these rules prior to us getting married and I think it is important that both parties are clear and convinced on how the finances will be handled post marriage. This should be done at least 6 months before the decision to get married. Obviously, this still doesn't preclude one party from changing their minds after marriage.

 

Going back to our joint account.... We use it for household items like mortgage, utilities, groceries, child expenses, joint meals and it has so far been under control (our family also consists of her mother and our 1 year old) . Jointly, we spend less than 1k a month on the above. Personal expenditures like transport and daily meals are on our own accounts. Our household income is not high compared to most of the folks here - still can buy HDB hor (less than 10k take home?) but we spend well within our means. Out of the take home, I would gather that we save at least 70% per month but this will surely decrease as my daughter gets older.

 

It hasn't been easy getting to this stage which I am happy with. When I met my wife, she too had some very useless friends. In fact, her best friend (which I've since exorcised from our lives) was a materialistic bitch who liked to create trouble between us. I don't usually go out with my wife when she meets her friends but it wasn't too soon when I realized that she would be more argumentative and demanding after meeting her friend. It took quite a far bit of effort and there was even some drama where her "friend" gave an ultimatum of choosing if she wanted to marry me or continue to be friends. We all know who "won".

 

Anyway, gotta go back to work!

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Haha mine also...

Cannot do housework and cannot cook... but is ok..

Impt is to click

I cook for my wife. Her idea of cooking is instant noodles or reheating food I prepared for her lol.

 

But she prepare the kids food. Lol I pity the kids ha.

Edited by Lala81
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I queued behind a lady whom I thought is pinoy at Orchard mrt station. To my Surprise, the left over account balance showed $720+k.

 

I need a Spouse like this to compliment my bank account.  [bigcry]

post-27974-0-13310700-1480383305_thumb.jpg

Edited by Vinceng
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ahem. cant praise you.

 

also, the left side suspension actually squeaked under the weight. not kidding. 

 

Might have caused you to change your tyres earlier due to uneven tyre wear. [laugh]  [laugh]

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Might have caused you to change your tyres earlier due to uneven tyre wear. [laugh]  [laugh]

 

Easily rectified.

 

Let her sit on the other side to even it out. (i.e. let her drive)

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