Hwa Chong to design its own workshops in future

[Jamesc]

  On 10/12/2014 at 3:06 PM, Sosaria said:

I guess nothing is absolute and you can't pigeon-hole people into traditional gender roles these days.

 

Usually the gender roles are more blurred these days with husbands also sharing the household chores and women earning as much if not more than their hubbies.

 

Traditional gender roles are generally maintained only when the wife is less educated or a house-wife

 

You are absolutely right.

 

Gender roles are now really blurred.

 

Can't tell who is the man and who is the women these days.

 

Some man have long hair and some women have short hair.

 

I was admiring the back side of what I thot was a slender frame

 

lady with nice long hair. I walked pass "her" and then realised

 

it was a man with a petit feminie body but face with pock maked.

 

I almost threw up my lunch.

 

[Jungus]

  On 10/13/2014 at 3:45 AM, Jamesc said:

 

You are absolutely right.

 

Gender roles are now really blurred.

 

Can't tell who is the man and who is the women these days.

 

Some man have long hair and some women have short hair.

 

I was admiring the back side of what I thot was a slender frame

 

lady with nice long hair. I walked pass "her" and then realised

 

it was a man with a petit feminie body but face with pock maked.

 

I almost threw up my lunch.

 

Actually you may have just been on the verge of discovering your inner self.....

[Jamesc]

  On 10/13/2014 at 3:32 AM, Kusje said:

 

Actually, the dynamics between a couple should solely be between the couple. If a couple is comfortable with a more "traditional" role then why should someone else come in and tell them it is wrong and that there should be more equality?

 

Just the other day, I read an article (I think it was in ST) that claims it is abuse if I tell my wife to do the housework and if I control who she meets and how often she meets them.

 

Well, I immediately called my wife over to read the article and we had a good laugh over it.

 

 

You mean you tell your wife to do the housework and controls

 

who she meets and how often?

 

You are a real man, I really admire you.

 

I have zero control over my wife.

 

She does what she wants

 

You can ever call your wife over.

 

I can't even call me dog over, he also does what he wants.

 

How do you do it, tell us your secret?

 

Edited October 13, 2014 by Jamesc

[Kusje]

  On 10/13/2014 at 4:16 AM, Jamesc said:

 

 

 

You mean you tell your wife to do the housework and controls

 

who she meets and how often?

 

You are a real man, I really admire you.

 

I have zero control over my wife.

 

She does what she wants

 

You can ever call your wife over.

 

I can't even call me dog over, he also does what he wants.

 

How do you do it, tell us your secret?

 

 

 

No secret la. It's about understanding what you want before getting married, evaluating your partner correctly and having open communication with your partner. Even before marriage, I already let her know what my expectations were. BTW, some of my friends and relatives say that it is impossible to find someone like my wife in the same generation as me (born 1980s) but I can tell you that I've met other girls who behave similarly.

 

For you, I think you have no choice but to put up with it because any drastic change will cause a lot of conflict between the two of you. Maybe WW3 will start right here in Singapore.

[Jellandross]

  On 10/13/2014 at 3:37 AM, Icemaiden said:

Not exactly accurate. Some women are capable of meaning yes when they say yes and no when they say no. It's very dangerous to spread this type of message. It's trying to say if a woman say no to sex, it actually means yes because women always lie. Many women are capable of keeping time and being punctual and 5 minutes does not mean 30 minutes. Maybe your wife and her friends behave this way but I'm sure there are other women who can keep time and mean what they say, not only at home but at the work place as well. This can be quite insulting to the general female population because after all, there are women who do not lie and mean what they say. And "sure go ahead" means "I don't want to"? What kind of education is this?

 

 

 

 

I agree this is not 100% accurate but it doesn't mean that it's totally false. There are women (and men) who behave this way and we all know there are exceptions too. I guess the book should potray both sides of the coin. I read this as more of a "possible" rather than "always" behavior and if it's possible, I see no harm in highlighting it. If the author is stupid enough to insinuate that all women are per described, then he really deserve to get shot.

 

As for the book being insulting, it is really a very individual perspective. If they state something about men that is true for some men but not for me, eg. Men are chauvinistic, I don't feel insulted at all because, well, they are not talking about me. And I don't feel insulted on behalf of other men because there are really certain men who are so.

 

Gender/sexual education can never please every reader because it will always be written from a certain limited perspective, eg. Education on pregnancy prevention or abstinence. I personally am for higher and wider awareness than not talking about it at all.

[Jamesc]

  On 10/13/2014 at 4:44 AM, Kusje said:

 

No secret la. It's about understanding what you want before getting married, evaluating your partner correctly and having open communication with your partner. Even before marriage, I already let her know what my expectations were. BTW, some of my friends and relatives say that it is impossible to find someone like my wife in the same generation as me (born 1980s) but I can tell you that I've met other girls who behave similarly.

 

For you, I think you have no choice but to put up with it because any drastic change will cause a lot of conflict between the two of you. Maybe WW3 will start right here in Singapore.

 

Haha you are right.

 

I don't think I can change the situation and better not to have WW3 in Spore.

 

[Darryn]

  On 10/12/2014 at 4:32 AM, Ktglfc said:

The student was not satisfied that a woman is deemed to have a traditional gender roles in a relationship. Likely she wants equal rights.

 

She can say now, but in future, when she have a family, have kids, she will likely devote much time in taking care of the kids... unless, she wants the hubby to be in the house all the time...

 

Anyway, Aware haven't come out to say anything...

 

Want equal rights? Then abolish the Woman Chapter lor...

As long as there is Woman's Chapter, there will never be equal rights, and these woman must understand that.

You cannot have the best of both worlds.

To be fair, AWARE have acknowledged that the Woman's Charter needs to be updated, and recent court decisions re: maintenance and alimony from the courts have also reflected new attitudes towards women and equality in society.

[Darryn]

  On 10/13/2014 at 3:37 AM, Icemaiden said:

Not exactly accurate. Some women are capable of meaning yes when they say yes and no when they say no. It's very dangerous to spread this type of message. It's trying to say if a woman say no to sex, it actually means yes because women always lie. Many women are capable of keeping time and being punctual and 5 minutes does not mean 30 minutes. Maybe your wife and her friends behave this way but I'm sure there are other women who can keep time and mean what they say, not only at home but at the work place as well. This can be quite insulting to the general female population because after all, there are women who do not lie and mean what they say. And "sure go ahead" means "I don't want to"? What kind of education is this?

 

 

 

More to the point -

 

When you teach boys that "No" really means "Yes" you are telling him that if a girl says "No" to sex, all he has to do is just "push harder" or "be more forceful"

 

As a father of girls, this is REALLY not a message that I want boys to have.

 

At the same time - you are giving girls the message that it is ok to disseminate, and that "girls don't ask for what they want - so you shouldn't either". Which is also not a message that I want my daughters to have.

 

Now, we all know that there is a kernal of truth to what is being said - so any discussion to be had should be about how such sterotypes arise, what to do about them, and why we have to be careful of applying them - none of which the course did.

 

It could also have acknowledged that there are (researched and "proven") differences in the way that men in general and women in general communicate, and suggest strategies for each to overcome this in a relationship - something that also seems to be missing.

 

But more to the point - those pages would have been a great illustration of the harm that sterotypes can do, rather than being presented as "eternal truths"