My little suggestion - A parenting folder perhaps?

[Icebrush79]

 

If you are an involved father (which you obviously are), your wife will appreciate it 10 times more than any push present.

Yeah lah, won't hurt to give one though lol

 

I try to be as involved as I can.... but inwardly, I know every women tend to feel abandoned and things along this line.

Why?

 

Because we are only given 1 week paternity leave by law. Sure, we can apply for another week or 2, that's all.

Wife have to go thru the entire maternity period alone most of the time.

 

Weekdays: Because wife stays with PILs now, I am not around at nights, tho I will stay till 12 midnight before going home. they stay west side, I stay central.

Some nights I work past midnight, I don't visit at all.

 

The feeling of not seeing my family is not tiring physically, but it is an awful feeling of guilt that I silently wished for empathy though I cannot tell my wife as I know she's having a worse time than I am.

 

That's parenthood I guess......... lots of adjustments and managing expectations

when change diapers, put a small cloth or wet wipe on his kukubird can liao...... another tell tale sign is when see it moving, ready to fire... lol

 

actually I usually just go polyclinic... quite fast.... they will give some nose drops to use.. very effective.... is it a lot pi sai?

 

both extreme... 1 sleep like pig... 1 abit abit wake up .... I prefer the sleep like pig type.... at night play call of duty and battlefield loud loud no issue... lol

 

More of blockage, ya pee sai too lol

 

Now I more or less can guess his kukubird pattern liao haha.

[Lala81]

 

I try to be as involved as I can.... but inwardly, I know every women tend to feel abandoned and things along this line.

Why?

 

Because we are only given 1 week paternity leave by law. Sure, we can apply for another week or 2, that's all.

Wife have to go thru the entire maternity period alone most of the time.

 

Weekdays: Because wife stays with PILs now, I am not around at nights, tho I will stay till 12 midnight before going home. they stay west side, I stay central.

Some nights I work past midnight, I don't visit at all.

 

The feeling of not seeing my family is not tiring physically, but it is an awful feeling of guilt that I silently wished for empathy though I cannot tell my wife as I know she's having a worse time than I am.

 

That's parenthood I guess......... lots of adjustments and managing expectations

 

My wife didn't want to stay with my parents. So while waiting for our flat, we stayed separately at our parent's place but she comes over for the weekends.

 

My 1st girl also confinement all done at my in-laws place. For more than 1 year, i only see my girl for 4 days a week.

Stay over at my parent's place from Friday evening to Sunday lunch. I'll send them back before heading to work.

 

Like that one lah, even now, mon/wed/thursday. I only see my girl before she head off to school.

Come back at 10-11 oclock, then she's either asleep or playing punk by not sleeping...

 

As long as you're involved with the care of the child, that's the most important.

I find it very funny when the parents don't know simple things like what milk their child drinks, what size diaper they wear, where they have rash etc...

[Simpleonly]

Just happen to see this thread, good topic..

 

But after so many months nd pages liao still no proper folder or move to the correct section?

 

:-)

[Othello]

Another tip from experience - Roseola Virus.

 

Fever with NO other symptoms and can last for a week. Can be quite worrying as fever takes very long to subside. Meaning after medication, will go up to high 38s or 39. In my case, because my younger boy has UTI history we have to make sure it is not a re-occurence.

 

Rashes appear after that.

 

http://kidshealth.org/parent/infections/skin/roseola.html

[Lala81]

Another tip from experience - Roseola Virus.

 

Fever with NO other symptoms and can last for a week. Can be quite worrying as fever takes very long to subside. Meaning after medication, will go up to high 38s or 39. In my case, because my younger boy has UTI history we have to make sure it is not a re-occurence.

 

Rashes appear after that.

 

http://kidshealth.org/parent/infections/skin/roseola.html

Review a fever with the doctor every 2 days. General rule of thumb

[Othello]

Review a fever with the doctor every 2 days. General rule of thumb

 

that's what we did. But without any other symptoms, all the doctors could advise is to just monitor .... In the past we did a urine test for fear of infection again. But that is a costly and time consuming option.

 

Lala - know of any place I can get a urine test strip (for uti ) locally ?

[Pocus]

Another tip from experience - Roseola Virus.

 

Fever with NO other symptoms and can last for a week. Can be quite worrying as fever takes very long to subside. Meaning after medication, will go up to high 38s or 39. In my case, because my younger boy has UTI history we have to make sure it is not a re-occurence.

 

Rashes appear after that.

 

http://kidshealth.org/parent/infections/skin/roseola.html

The fever will disappear all a sudden and the spots will follow. It's also nicknamed "fake measles"

[Lala81]

Parenting. Always learning how to improve your parenting and yourself as a person.

 

Good article on how to minimise "fake growth mindset". Many parents now know that praise has to be targeted. But the way u praise effort is also important or else it just worsens the problem.

 

Not easy to implement in real life even though I've all this theory in my head!

 

https://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2016/12/how-praise-became-a-consolation-prize/510845/

[SuPerBoRed]

Parenting. Always learning how to improve your parenting and yourself as a person.

 

Good article on how to minimise "fake growth mindset". Many parents now know that praise has to be targeted. But the way u praise effort is also important or else it just worsens the problem.

 

Not easy to implement in real life even though I've all this theory in my head!

 

https://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2016/12/how-praise-became-a-consolation-prize/510845/

 

You know bro... my parents era... my grandparents era... all dont have these type of access to such ''help'' articles and etc...

 

i think we all turned out pretty ok dont you think so?

 

I think sometimes its good to take a step back... and not overthink things... ya know wat i mean?

 

There is only one key word in parenting...  its the understated.. ''communication''

 

PS.. im a dink... so.. mayb i shld keep my comments to myself... apologies if any ill feeling taken.. 

Edited March 27, 2017 by SuPerBoRed

[Mason016]

You know bro... my parents era... my grandparents era... all dont have these type of access to such ''help'' articles and etc...

 

i think we all turned out pretty ok dont you think so?

 

I think sometimes its good to take a step back... and not overthink things... ya know wat i mean?

 

There is only one key word in parenting...  its the understated.. ''communication''

 

PS.. im a dink... so.. mayb i shld keep my comments to myself... apologies if any ill feeling taken.. 

 

Some fella once said, "It's not what you say, but how you say it".  The article is talking about communication.  Hahah, DINKs also need to communicate with each other as well, communication doesn't apply exclusively to parenting.  

[Lala81]

You know bro... my parents era... my grandparents era... all dont have these type of access to such ''help'' articles and etc...

 

i think we all turned out pretty ok dont you think so?

 

I think sometimes its good to take a step back... and not overthink things... ya know wat i mean?

 

There is only one key word in parenting...  its the understated.. ''communication''

 

PS.. im a dink... so.. mayb i shld keep my comments to myself... apologies if any ill feeling taken.. 

 

It's not just about communication.

Many western parents have great "communication" or self perceived good relationships with their kids.

 

Parenting is about unconditional acceptance of your child as an individual and being a positive influence on their lives.

It's like how some parents are a great influence to their children despite them being the stereotypical asian patriarch or old school father in the West.

 

Anyway, parenting is a skill or ability that can be learnt and improved over the years. If you never think something can be done better, than it will never be done in a better way. Just like all the skills we learnt at work, it's the same.

 

I'm not offended. 

Some people are naturally predisposed to being good nurturers. I just find that such articles provide some insight on how you can parent in a way that you think is suitable for your child.

[Lala81]

Some fella once said, "It's not what you say, but how you say it".  The article is talking about communication.  Hahah, DINKs also need to communicate with each other as well, communication doesn't apply exclusively to parenting.  

 

I've had to learn how to communicate with my wife better too.

I'm naturally a poor communicator. I don't bother to explain myself too much 

[Enrick_89]

 

when your kid come out, you will know whether you married the right woman 

 

It's ok one lah. If the love & responsibility is there, everything else comes naturally. 

Well said.

[Pinobii]

Are you a loving lion?