Sharing of Good Jokes

[lausai88]

 

 

[lausai88]

 

 

 

[keanie]

This joke mainly for all the married man.

[BanCoe]

Time pass ....

[Doppel]

  On 1/22/2016 at 6:48 AM, Byteslurve said:

[Porker]

  On 4/28/2016 at 5:41 AM, Byteslurve said:

Yo mama is so fat, NASA qualified her as a planet.

 

Your mother so fat, that when she jump for joy she got stuck

[DawnIntanFarhana]

[BanCoe]

This one is Really No Joke ......

[keanie]

[lausai88]

 

 

[Byteslurve]

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are planning a party.

“I’ll bring six pints of bitter,” says the Englishman.

“I’ll bring six pints of Guinness,” says the Irishman.

“I’ll bring six friends,” says the Scot.

[Byteslurve]

“Dad,” says a Spanish boy to his father,

“when I’m grown up I want to be just like you.”

“That’s nice, son. Why?”

“So I can have a son like me!”

[Byteslurve]

The Ukrainians on the (filthy rich but stupid) Russians:

 

“I’ve just bought a tie for $3,000.”

“Idiot! You could have bought the same one just down the street for $5,000.”

[Byteslurve]

Obama: Hey Modi... How are you?

Modi: I'm good Barack. How are you doing?

Obama: I'm absolutely fine. Where is Kejriwal, BTW?

Modi: Not sure, but probably in Punjab or Delhi.

Obama: He is doing amazing work, I'm so inpressed!

Modi: !!!

Obama: The way his Mohalla Clinic near Mahima Furniture, Kriti Nagar is working is fabulous! Also the way Rakesh Tomar, Vivek Goel & Tanya Arora got driving licences without bribe is amazing... it proves that corruption is really coming down...
Modi: !!!!

Obama: .... Due to Odd-Even the way pollution level came down at Munirika, Ward No 6 clearly shows his commitment towards Delhi. And don't you think that the way he sent water tanker in just 1 hour to Laxmi Nagar, near Metro station after water pipeline damage was beyond imagination in previous govt.?

Modi: hmmmmmm... But Barack how do you know all this?

Obama: Oh Man... It's simple... Yesterday I was reading his 4 page advertisement in New York Times!!!

....and few minutes later Canadian PM Justin Trudeau calls PM Modi.... And rest you know....

[Byteslurve]

Two nuns were shopping in a food store and happened to be passing the beer and liquor section.

One asks the other if she would like a beer.
The other nun answered that would be good, but that she would be queasy about purchasing it.
The first nun said that she would handle it and picked up a six pack and took it to the cashier.
The cashier had a surprised look and the first nun said, "This is for washing our hair."
The cashier without blinking an eye, reached under the counter and put a package of pretzel sticks in the bag with the beer saying, "Here, don't forget the curlers."

[Byteslurve]

At a dinner party the other night my wife tried to embarrass me by telling our guests about an argument that's been ongoing in our house hold.

"Yes," she said smugly. "He's well trained, I have constantly reminded him to put the seat down after he's used the toilet and like a good little boy, he now does as he's told."

They all started laughing at me then one of her friends turned to me and said, "Hha, totally pussy whipped aren't you!"

"No not really," I replied calmly. "I'v just been pissing in the sink for the last 6 months."

[Byteslurve]

Marriage is like a bar of soap. It smells delicious until you take a bite out of it!

[Byteslurve]

My old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, “You’re next!”

After a while, I figured out how to stop them. I started doing the same thing to them at funerals!