Jman888 Moderator February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 Watched the movie 'The Sessions', funny but interesting...... and there is such profession in singapore Confessions of a sex therapist Saturday, Feb 16, 2013 Mind Your Body, The Straits Times By Joan Chew SINGAPORE - Occupational and sex therapist Ms Shirlene Toh has a patient to thank for prompting her to set up the Sexual Wellness Service, providing sexuality education to patients with disabilities at the rehabilitation centre. About a decade ago, a tetraplegic man in his 30s, who had lost all feeling from the neck down because of a road traffic accident, told her he was concerned about how he would "perform" when he returned home. The 36-year-old recalled: "I summoned up the courage to ask him what he meant specifically and he said he feared his condition would affect his relationship with his wife." It dawned on Ms Toh that sexuality was an issue of great concern to her patients. With advice from a senior therapist, she gathered information to teach the man about the impact of spinal cord injury on sexuality. She pursued a master's degree in sexual health at the University of Sydney in Australia in 2005 on a Ministry of Health award. She is now a principal occupational therapist at Tan Tock Seng Hospital's (TTSH) Rehabilitation Centre and the only trained sex therapist at TTSH. Ms Toh is married to a 36-year-old engineer. They have two sons, aged seven and four. I specialise in sexual wellness and education because... Sex is a part of everyday life that is more often neglected than, say, bathing, dressing and walking. Very often, patients' sexual concerns are not addressed adequately or patients do not know whom to seek help from. They are often fearful of seeking help from health-care professionals, so they resort to trying things on their own and putting themselves and their partners at risk of injury. One little known fact about being a sex therapist is... We are taught how to address sexual issues a person may encounter throughout life. These include the development of sexuality, masturbation, fantasy, sexual abuse, sexually transmitted illnesses, cybersex, gay and lesbian relationships and so on. The aim is to expand our awareness and understanding of the most relevant sexual issues in today's society. I have to be non-judgmental. Even though I am against pre-marital sex, I still advise patients who want to engage in it to practise safe sex. If I were to give an analogy for what I do, I would... Be a Cupid who is a catalyst in helping others rekindle their love for each other. I encourage my patients and their partners to keep open lines of communication and share their thoughts and feelings. A typical day for me... Has me waking up at 6.30am to be in the office by 7.30am. I have dual roles of an occupational therapist and sex therapist. When patients' partners come along for the sexuality session, I may spend up to an hour counselling them. In total, I see four to six patients a day. When I see a patient for the first time, I explain to him my role as a sex therapist and start with an education session about how the disability - whether from stroke or a spinal cord or brain injury - may affect his sexual expression. Men with spinal cord injuries may have difficulty achieving erection or ejaculation, while women may lack lubrication or be psychologically fearful of engaging in sex. I will then ask the patient about his sexual experience and address common misconceptions of sexuality and disability, such as thinking that people with disabilities are no longer sexual beings. I have come across all types of cases... From simple cases that involve teaching a man or his partner how to put on a condom to more complex cases which involve the use of devices to create erections. I love patients who are... Keen to work on building satisfying relationships. Both parties accept that they have problems in their relationships and are receptive to counselling. They will usually have common goals and are willing to explore different strategies. Patients who get my goat are... Those who insist that communication is unimportant in a relationship. Some men insist that it is the duty of the wife to "serve" the husband and neglect building trust and making each other feel loved. Patients may hold values that are difficult to change, which makes it challenging to change their mindsets and hence their behaviour. Things that put a smile on my face are... Patients continuing to have fulfilling relationships post-injury. Some tell me the current states of their relationships surpass that of when they were dating or on their honeymoon. They appreciate the advice I give and are able to work with their partners to reach a common objective. It breaks my heart when... Patients with sexual concerns are left struggling on their own, leading them to try unsafe sexual methods and feeling depressed. They may also suffer in silence and slowly withdraw from society because they are fearful of meeting people. They may eventually be unable to form significant relationships with others. I would not trade places for the world because... I feel that everyone has a right to love and be loved. The inability to access correct information and the lack of education are stumbling blocks to achieving rewarding and fulfilling relationships. My best tip is... Health-care professionals should understand their own sexual attitudes, beliefs and values, after which they need to decide if they are comfortable addressing patients' sexual concerns. If these concerns are raised and their body language shows they are awkward discussing them, patients pick this up as something negative. This, in turn, will deter them from seeking professional help. Those who are uncomfortable discussing sexuality with their patients should refer them to others who are comfortable doing so. ↡ Advertisement Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RadX Moderator February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 yes. It is a specialty of OT Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jman888 Moderator February 19, 2013 Author Share February 19, 2013 (edited) yes. It is a specialty of OT i where got OT? [laugh] very interesting and i wonder do they have the same 'specialist' here to 'do' the job like Helen Hunt in the movie? Edited February 19, 2013 by Jman888 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RadX Moderator February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 i where got OT? [laugh] very interesting and i wonder do they have the same 'specialist' here to 'do' the job like Helen Hunt in the movie? OT si Occupational Therapist lah Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jman888 Moderator February 19, 2013 Author Share February 19, 2013 OT si Occupational Therapist lah i know lah Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Viceroymenthol 6th Gear February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 What kind of occupational tools do they use? Hands? Mouth? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mockngbrd Supersonic February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 Sex the rapist Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamesc Hypersonic February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 People are amazed that there are these kind of jobs in Singapore. I am not as I am studying to be a sex therapist. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sabian Turbocharged February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 Sex the rapist like that also can... Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bugactix7 Neutral Newbie February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 I think many people confuse sexual therapists with sexual surrogates. Two very different concepts. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin 4th Gear February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 interesting job.... guess a lot of bros here qualify to become one Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarzan666 2nd Gear February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 does she watch sex acts? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Bear Turbocharged February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 does she watch sex acts? I dunno why people pay to see her when we have so many in house experts here like Jman and Pork. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jman888 Moderator February 19, 2013 Author Share February 19, 2013 I dunno why people pay to see her when we have so many in house experts here like Jman and Pork. ok must clarify i handle the two opp sex therapy, pork handle the sex between same sex -_- Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Bear Turbocharged February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 ok must clarify i handle the two opp sex therapy, pork handle the sex between same sex -_- And who handles those between human and animals? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jman888 Moderator February 19, 2013 Author Share February 19, 2013 And who handles those between human and animals? that would be your expertise but how does animal voice out their unhappiness? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Bear Turbocharged February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 that would be your expertise but how does animal voice out their unhappiness? I dunno. I tried to explain that to the therapist but she insisted that communication is the key to all sexual relationships. How do I tell her I am into beastiality? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
RadX Moderator February 19, 2013 Share February 19, 2013 I dunno. I tried to explain that to the therapist but she insisted that communication is the key to all sexual relationships. How do I tell her I am into beastiality? She got tell u go f camel? ↡ Advertisement Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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