Be careful of buying online insurance!!!!

[Cruise]

This topic is with regards to the latest hot topic about voiding of insurance claims JUST FOR LAUGHS

 

Now pretend I work for insurance company and I am a top top top top top laywer, I may draft this terms and conditions:

After the the accident, the driver may be asked to do a blood test to prove that he is not in a at least 90% state of clear mind due to the food or drink he takes, therefore completely voiding his claims as food like chili and drinks like coffee may cause him to over react and swerve the car or cause him to misjudge a traffic condition. We will get the best scientist to prove it in the laboratory so even our govt also cannot do anything. If the clothing you wear may cause itchiness and redness in the skin althouh only temporarily because those are new clothing, insurance will be void as you may be spending more time scratching than holding on to the steering wheel, therefore causing that accident. if your socks are skin sensitive type, don't worry our scientist will prove it that you may not be stepping fully on the brakes moments before you hit the car in front, therefore we will void your insurance. For women driver, we will check your menstrual cycle to prove that you are having PMS or menstrual cramp and you had not taken sufficient medicine to reduce the symptons, therefre completely voiding your insurance as you are not in the correct state of mind to drive the car. We only insure 99% sane drivers. For drivers above 45, we will try our best to prove that you are sffering from menopause and you had not gone for hormonal treatment, therefore it may affect your mood and judgement on road conditions, therefore we are please to void your policy. However if you wish to have your treatment done by injecting hormone into your body, you can purchase our motor insurance and hormonal restoration treatment in one package.

 

If all the above fails, we will use the last resort, we will check your ancestor history, probably get the warrant to dig up the burried or open up the ash urn to collect samples and hopefully to prove that your family line has a higher tendancy to cause accidents and you have a certain gene defects that may trigger moments before an accident. We will get the best Nobel Prize winners and Scientist to prove it. In this case, your premium should be higher than others. In view of this, you are short changing us by a few percent of your premium. Since premium is not fully paid and you have a pre existing condition, we will void your policy. Since you did not declare whether directly or indirectly about your family history, we reserve the right to prosecute you in any country within the solar system and not restricted to the milky way galaxy, preferrably at the Republic of Avivocity.

 

I think I can be a lawyer and work for insurance company and many people will curse me. Luckily I am not!

Edited June 2, 2011 by Cruise

[Cruise]

If found out that your car has got babies crying or children fighting or dogs trying to lick your face while you are driving, insurance will VOID!

[Takumi21]

they nv check if found any nose s--t tissue under your finger.. prove that you been focusing more on digging nose den holding on e wheels when driving.. insurance will VOID!

[Cruise]

they nv check if found any nose s--t tissue under your finger.. prove that you been focusing more on digging nose den holding on e wheels when driving.. insurance will VOID!

 

Yes definitely! Probably insurance company will strip you naked at the accident scene so that can inspect your clothings under mocroscope to the nanometer precision. Then you wll be naked and put into a vacumn tupe with the minimum amout of air to prevent you from brain dead, then u wll be shipped to the nearest hospital to check mucus, saliva and s--t on your finger and toes. You could be digging your backside while driving and such actions may caused that accident.

[Takumi21]

Yes definitely! Probably insurance company will strip you naked at the accident scene so that can inspect your clothings under mocroscope to the nanometer precision. Then you wll be naked and put into a vacumn tupe with the minimum amout of air to prevent you from brain dead, then u wll be shipped to the nearest hospital to check mucus, saliva and s--t on your finger and toes. You could be digging your backside while driving and such actions may caused that accident.

 

so ma fan?

 

just chop the fingers can liao..

[Cruise]

so ma fan?

 

just chop the fingers can liao..

 

Yes, after that you can claim from life insurance. The lfe insurance dispute the claim as your fingers were not chopped of by accident.

[Darkblue]

Maybe they can estimate the time of accident & the radio station that you are tuning to...

 

If play fast music = more aggressive = likely to cause accident.

 

From tomorrow onwards can close down any discussion on ICE or sound-proofing ?? Safety hazard !!

[S7rik3R]

How about Myna comes hijack the car and get into accident ?? Always come across stupid Myna comes diving straight into the windscreen then driver got shock and get into accident how?

Edited June 2, 2011 by S7rik3R

[Cruise]

How about Myna comes hijack the car and get into accident ?? Always come across stupid Myna comes diving straight into the windscreen then driver got shock and get into accident how?

 

If this happens, insurance void, perhaps I can recommend you to take 1 panadol before every trip, that is suppose to calm you down, make u sweat a little and reduce body heat so you won't be scared by that Myna. I may suggest every car driver that buys my insurance have to go through a Myna smashing course where they will drive through a tunnel full of Myna. At the end of the tunnel, every Myna caught on windscreen entitles you to 0.0001% extra NCD as reward. So you either make sure you take panadol 30 min before driving, get your blood tested and upload to my insurance website, wait for my doctor's approval before you dive or you go through the Myna smashing course.

Edited June 2, 2011 by Cruise

[Takumi21]

stock car came wif minerial engine oil, driver change to synthetic oil.. not stock engine oil.. insurance void!

 

whole singapore car no need insurance liao lor.. muahahaha

[SimonTan]

Just do a simple blood test.

 

Everyone will have traces of Drugs and Alcohol in our blood, naturally.

 

Just these two reasons will void any accident claims liao!!

 

[Cruise]

Just do a simple blood test.

 

Everyone will have traces of Drugs and Alcohol in our blood, naturally.

 

Just these two reasons will void any accident claims liao!!

 

Good idea! I have taken at least 3 complete dose of antibioltics in my whole life, should I stop driving and take MRT? Wha is the MRT drier also take drug? Ah....take driverless MRT. What if the MRT controller also take drug? I think walk is better, Singapore was a fishing village anyway.

[Opel17]

If all the above still cannot void the insurance claims, then do brain scan whether the driver distracted by braless girl on the road and lost control of vehicle. Surely void claims.