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Lelong Lelong: Li Gong Knives For Sale!!!

Vulcann

By Vulcann,
in Lite & EZ

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Vulcann

Vulcann

6th Gear

Dear sir/madam,

 

I am the local rep of the famous Li Gong Knife company & I am happy for you today because we are having our 57th year anniversary celebration this year and as part of a series of celebrations, we are having a discounted price for all our brand name Li Gong Knife's knives.

 

This is where you should feel happy because we always have your interest at heart & thus have been supplying good quality knives to folks here. We would also like to thank you for your tremendous support all these years in return.

 

So like what I mentioned earlier, we will offer all our knives at a significant discount.

 

Please be assured that even though our knives are made of plastic, it feels & look like a real knife. It almost can be used for cutting but try not to do that as it might break.

 

You can be proud & tell other folks that you have Li Gong Knife's full set of knives together with your other real knives.

 

Remember: Even they are not real ones, they look & feel like the real deal.

 

Even though the actual sale date will be made in due course, you can order now to enjoy the discounted price plus a delivery charge of 7%.

 

Our HQ has hinted but not confirmed that the delivery charge might increase to 10%if the costs continue to raise so please take advantage of the low rate now.

 

Thank you once again for all your wonderful support all these years & we hope to have more good years to serve you better.

 

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Galantspeedz

Galantspeedz

Turbocharged

sorry, what is the purpose of the so call li gong knife? a plastic knife that not suppose to use for cutting? then buy for wat? :huh::huh:

 

I think trying to imitate 1 of the Mcfers who post story but actually referring to MIW

 

If really that is the case, super epic fail.... More n more of these story tellers is popping up but only the original tells it best

 

EPIC FAIL!!!

 

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Doosan

Doosan

1st Gear

ha.....ha....bro, erection is cumming.

 

hv u read some thing like if market is good, then gst will be maintain at 7%.

 

hung-cheng pai2, then sori, it may go up to 1O% yoh....yoh....

 

r u looking 4a plastic knife for birthday/ full-moon cake ? :D

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Tigershark1976

Tigershark1976

Turbocharged

I think trying to imitate 1 of the Mcfers who post story but actually referring to MIW

 

If really that is the case, super epic fail.... More n more of these story tellers is popping up but only the original tells it best

 

EPIC FAIL!!!

 

 

wah lao... like that also can...... :mellow::mellow:

 

btw, TS hanyu pinyin cannot make it lah... should be "lei gong" not "li gong" (thunder) brand.

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Vulcann

Vulcann

6th Gear
  • Author

sorry, what is the purpose of the so call li gong knife? a plastic knife that not suppose to use for cutting? then buy for wat? :huh::huh:

 

Dear sir,

 

You purchase it mainly for grand display just in case people criticize you for not having any knives because every household is supposed to have them.

 

Where some households apparently does not have them, we understand members of the household protested & even revolted against the head of the household. In some cases, matters really got outa hand because the disgruntled folks threw these heads out of the house.

 

We strongly believe real knives might cause injuries so we strongly recommend our brand of pseudo knives to placate your family members who strong want to have knives.

 

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Vulcann

Vulcann

6th Gear
  • Author

I think trying to imitate 1 of the Mcfers who post story but actually referring to MIW

 

If really that is the case, super epic fail.... More n more of these story tellers is popping up but only the original tells it best

 

EPIC FAIL!!!

 

[;)]

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Watwheels

Watwheels

Supersonic

If I were to be associated with "Li Gong Knife Co." I will be laughing my ass off when I read this, in fact I already did. I will even share this joke with rival companies. Laugh until pengz.

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Vulcann

Vulcann

6th Gear
  • Author

ha.....ha....bro, erection is cumming.

 

hv u read some thing like if market is good, then gst will be maintain at 7%.

 

hung-cheng pai2, then sori, it may go up to 1O% yoh....yoh....

 

r u looking 4a plastic knife for birthday/ full-moon cake ? :D

 

No other company sell these pseudo knives so you folks should be glad our company offers them for sale.

 

There are basically 2 types:

 

(a) NMP

 

These are non-metallic plastic types which although weaker & deteriorates after 2.5 years are really value for money. They are generally good for display purposes.

 

(b) NCMP

 

These are the stronger nickel-carbide metallic plastic types which are sharper, rougher & preferably not good for display but nonetheless good to have them. They should be in your household to show other families you apparently have knives. Lasting up to 5 years, they make good household items for keep. Due to their rough but near-knife nature, we have received reports that people actually thought they are the real macoy & want to use them. Our advice is not to do that because they are not real.

 

The reason why we do not sell real knives is because our in-house experts have previously conducted a detailed study over 45 years & found out knives are no good & should not be in households as they may cause injuries in our experts' opinion.

 

However, people still prefer to have them so we still sell them as well.

 

Our stand is real knives bad, pseudo knives good...

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Vulcann

Vulcann

6th Gear
  • Author

wah lao... like that also can...... :mellow::mellow:

 

btw, TS hanyu pinyin cannot make it lah... should be "lei gong" not "li gong" (thunder) brand.

 

Really paiseh, can't even spell our company name right. Please don't report this especially to our chairman as he is known to tear easily.

 

Since he will be retiring soon, we are hoping his successor will be able to better control his emotions but unfortunately scuttlebutt has it that the new guy also likes to cry in public.

 

OMG...

 

Anyway I will correct the name immediately.

 

Thank you.

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Vulcann

Vulcann

6th Gear
  • Author

Your plastic knives does not cut well against elements but it cuts deep into ppls pockets ............. :ph34r::ph34r:

 

Dear sir,

 

Do not worry about injuries being caused by our plastic knives.

 

As you are aware ours is a group company which also include other services like medical, transport, education, defense products, etc...

 

So in the event of any injuries please come to any of our medical facilities to seek treatment. You will be granted priority as our customer and also pay a highly-subsidized rate.

 

Folks who do not buy our knives will have to be in the long long queue, pardon the language but basically tan gu gu & pay the full rate.

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Vulcann

Vulcann

6th Gear
  • Author

If I were to be associated with "Li Gong Knife Co." I will be laughing my ass off when I read this, in fact I already did. I will even share this joke with rival companies. Laugh until pengz.

 

Dun laugh le, we sell knives you laugh... [laugh] [laugh]

 

Wait no more knives to sell you then you KPKB... [laugh] [laugh]

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Fireball0088

Fireball0088

5th Gear

I think trying to imitate 1 of the Mcfers who post story but actually referring to MIW

 

If really that is the case, super epic fail.... More n more of these story tellers is popping up but only the original tells it best

 

EPIC FAIL!!!

 

walau.... thanks for the clarification....i read and read and still wondering what the hell is he trying to sell? [laugh]

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