Dear Parents, what can you do if . . .

[Alfisti168]

actually I learnt from my wife that if someone is "volunteering" to make himself feel better (feel important, feel like a saint), that's not true volunteerism

LOL.

 

I volunteer bcoz it is one of my ways of spending time and to feel satisfied with myself after seeing the kids being happy. So I feel better. Not true volunteerism?

[Darryn]

actually I learnt from my wife that if someone is "volunteering" to make himself feel better (feel important, feel like a saint), that's not true volunteerism

 

Heh - I wrote about this in one of my management assignments at uni - basic arguement was that the "utility" someone gets from volunteering comes from somewhere - if is not money, then must be psychic utility from how volunteering makes the person feel. My reasoning was that there must be something that motivates the person to volunteer - even a saint volunteers because they feel it "is the right thing to do", so although material rewards aren't their motivator, then non material rewards are.

 

For me, when I volunteer its because I feel I have "an obligation" to be good, and I get a certain sense of satisfaction from fulfilling that obligation

[Alfisti168]

gd sch or not, does it matter? i also come from neighbourhood sch... still end up a graduate wad,

and btw ppl from good schools aka elites tend to think that wadeva they think is right. So they engage in more sex.

[Hub_n_mona]

well, I am no expert but I think there is a subtle difference in feeling good after seeing someone feel better than volunteering for one's own reason of feeling better..

(if the above makes sense at all..lol)

[Genie47]

Volunteering needs empathy.

 

You don't feel better from it. You feel the fear a child has when using a zebra crossing with a block head driver approaching.

 

You feel the fear of a parent knowing that block head drivers exists.

 

You do something about it because you know a child or parent knows someone is stepping into the line to make them feel safer.

[Kxbc]

There is this episode in Friends when Joey said something along the line that there are no true selfless folks. Everyone is selfish. Even if we help someone unconditionally, we are only doing it because we feel good about it. So it's always about me me me. A bit crazy but probably true in many instances. Cynical Joey!

[Kxbc]

That's how I feel after reading your post.

[Hub_n_mona]

 

I am sure there are selfless people out there..

maybe because of the society we grow up in, we become suspicious of others

that's why sometimes it's better to interact with kids..pure

when a kid shares with you a chocolate, he shares with you a chocolate

[Kxbc]

Maybe he/she dropped that chocolate onto the floor earlier and he/she does not want to eat it anymore! Uncle easy to bluff!

 

Ok lah, most kids are not so evil.

[Ace]

Yeah well that's the point I was trying to make - there should be more to life than trying to "enhance career" or "volunteer to get reward". Reward is nice, but volunteering should be its own reward.

 

The idea of a society should be that each gives according to his ability, and each receives according to his need...

 

or to put it another way "noblesse oblige" to use an old French saying - in other words "nobility" has its obligations. Which in a egalitarian society like Singapore should be read to mean, if you have the ability to help, then you should.

 

Now naturally this is a very "rose coloured glasses" view of the world, but wouldn't we all be just that bit better off of we looked at things in terms of what we can give instead of what we expect to receive?

 

To go all touchy feelhy on the matter, I remember a segment of Napoleon Hill's "Think and Grow Rich" (one of the most famous positive thinking books). He espoused a concept of a "collective subconscious" whereby if you gave help honestly and without regard for the return then you would get rewards from another area when you least expect it to a much greater value than the help you offered.

 

Or putting it into terms of networking, I have read many times that the biggest mistake people make when networking is to expect returns / rewards too quickly...that you must always "put into" a network before you can "get out" (i.e - help others before you expect the returns)

 

If you are volunteering at a school, it should be because it is something you want to do, and you want to be a part of your kid's education, not to simply get the "reward" of admittance. I admit that the reward is a bonus, but it shouldn't be the key moitivator. Its a shame that this is seen as key, and to my way of thinking a certain sad indictment on society that we need to think in terms of "reward" before we are willing to volunteer.

 

Am I perfect and a Mahatma Ghandi or Buddha? Nope, I also enjoy the benefits extended when I do volunteerism, just saying I didn't do it for the benefits, but because I think I should do what little I can to help in my society.

 

BTW - not that I am trying to pinpoint towards you, just my thoughts on the matter.

 

 

Ok, not to worry, I am not one of those PV anyway and do not intend to PV either just feel short change when

PV kid have higher priority getting a place over those who stay nearer to school.

 

anyway, I believe the idea of PV is meant to be good in the first place since it allow parents to understand

the school environment. Having said that, I do notice that in Singapore, there is this tendancy when a reward

is accord to the PV, or the incentive is too good the meaning of PV is lost and subsequently maybe abuse or misused.

 

I see some correlation between PV on a lesser scale to those Reni Ci, NKF on a greater scale.

I believe the monk and TT Durai probably have started in good faith to raise money for their charity.

However, when the money come too easy and too quickly, that is where all those abuse, misuse,etc come in.

 

Well afterall, greed is one major weakness of human. just to share my thoughts.

 

[A_korusawa]

That said, a few thoughts for you

1) don't assume that you know the full story - there may be stuff going on that you don't see

----

well, when I 1st found out - I actually spoken to the commitee about and had been patiently waited for 3 months. still, after 4 months - its still happened and worsened!

2) Even if there is something underhand going on, what do you think you can achieve by complaining? Its going to be very hard to prove, and you are just as liable to have yourself labelled as a trouble maker if you speak up

----

that's true, that's why this thread instead of email complains

3) If the PV committee is being run this way, why not look into your RC? Same benefits but with a more transparent management structure and more relevance as you actually live in the community

----

its too late now, less I fork out 5 figure donations. & that's insane.

Edited November 24, 2009 by A_korusawa

[Revolc81]

and btw ppl from good schools aka elites tend to think that wadeva they think is right. So they engage in more sex.

 

some of them ego super high... cannot admit mistakes de la...

 

they engage in more sex? how how? elaborate lei?

[Tiny_planet]

I'm one of the PV who successfully enrolled my kid at phase 2B (no balloting) this year into the school I preferred her to have her primary education. The reason is that my MIL can send/fetch her to school daily as she stays nearby. This school from the past 4-years of history will go into balloting at phase 2C. I'm staying about 2.6km away and hence I will have no chance at all.

 

The PV committee organise monthly meeting and it is during the meeting that whatever events or activities will be highlighted and the parents present in that particular meeting will be able to sign up. For those who did not turn up will have no chance to sign up as the committee strongly discourage for parents attending the meeting to sign up on behalf of another parent who did not turn up.

 

I guess whether parents wanted to perform PV is very individual. I'm one of those whom initially condemn on performing the 40 hours. However, after participating in the PV work such as school Sports Day, overnight school camp (9 hours of PV at one go), educational trips to Science Centre, Farms etc, I find it very interesting and "engage" with the school.

 

For those parents who wanted to be at phase 2B and are registering their kid (born in 2005) for P1 in year 2011, now is the time to check out the school you are targetting. Some schools take-in PV as early as 1.5-2 years in advance so that you can take your time to clock the 40 hours.

[1fast1]

[Phoebe]Damn you, Tribbiani, you Evil Genius!![/Phoebe]

[Alfisti168]

some of them ego super high... cannot admit mistakes de la...

 

they engage in more sex? how how? elaborate lei?

its known lar. Elite JCs got higher abortion rates coz they think no need condom also can. exception is CJC - known for its staircase 5 and 6.

Edited November 24, 2009 by Alfisti168

[Alfisti168]

but now dunno which staircase liao. long tym nv update. lol.

Edited November 24, 2009 by Alfisti168

[Revolc81]

its known lar. Elite JCs got higher abortion rates coz they think no need condom also can. exception is CJC - known for its staircase 5 and 6.

 

I do heard a lot of story from NJC. About abortion rates of course.

[Haziqko]

and btw ppl from good schools aka elites tend to think that wadeva they think is right. So they engage in more sex.

 

 

do u mean the students or the PVs...??? anyway good effort to divert the topic.Looks like PVs getting slammed here....