Household Budget

[Carndablues]

Hehe joint acct works for some people...but only if they have the mentality that the joint acct is for the family...you are not giving $$$$ to your wife...

 

I only have one account, and that's a joint one with my wife, opened it even when we were just dating.

 

I've never had the idea that a married couple should have split assets, then why get married in the first place? It's a matter of trust.

 

As most forummers here like to say, in reference to the "gahmen", in one pocket, out the other. This is the same with husband and wife, so what if you have separate accounts? If you have kids, if you have shared interests (house/car etc) then you're dipping from the same pool.

 

So when you budget, involve your wife, that way there is some accountability from all stakeholders.

[Tunge]

Unlike most of the other forummers, I think $8k is ok what. What else is included in the $8k bro? Money does not go very far these days. For eg, I can think of:

 

- utilities

- cable TV, phone, handphone, internet bills

- income taxes

- children's school fees

- car installments (I assume she has her own car), petrol, road tax, insurance, servicing etc

- marketing for foodstuff

- supermarketing for groceries

- mortgage payments?

- club membership fees?

- eating out with kids at restaurants?

- children's other classes e.g. swimming, art, dancing etc?

- clothing and shoes for kids?

- money for her parents/younger siblings?

 

Why don't you list down all the $8k is supposed to pay for? You may find that it't not too much after all.

 

 

u think 8K is ok b'cos u never read his post clearly

The 8K is only for

-bills

-untilities,

-childrens pre-school fees,

-groceries

 

Other expenses like her hairdo, medical, and other adhoc items are excluded

 

 

[Friedpiggy]

Problem is no matter how much more I earn, she'll find ways to get more from me.

 

At this rate, if I divorce her someday, I'm gonna get screwed big time.

 

Just tell her that at that rate she is spending you will divorce her someday. May work :P

 

or try nagging at her for overspending.... EVERYDAY... slowly overtime you'll see the expenses goes down, thats provided she doesnt divorce you first.

 

 

I did both. Works for me

[City100a]

it is not the time to find whose fault it is although it is the easiest way out

 

it is nature

 

but perhaps you may want to sit down and think it through and figure out what is the underlying reasons

 

basically you are the ONLY one that will ever know

 

good luck and best wishes

[Nobrainer32007]

TS, you don't sound rich to me so wondering how true is the S$8k monthly thingy. Assuming you have S$8k to spare, your gross monthly pay should be about $20k (unless you eat grass and take bus and mrt to work). if so, still EA only and civic (correct me if i am wrong) only? unless you have a few investment properties. smelly smelly also EC and 318 / c180.

 

secondly, why say such things about your wify in such public arena? get a PI if you r really puzzled / suspicious.

 

talk less do more. and no need to show off how well off you are even if it is really the case.

 

 

 

For a family of 4, living in a EA, no maids, 1 car. My wife is asking for nearly $8k this month. This would include bills, untilities, childrens pre-school fees, groceries. Other expenses like her hairdo, medical, and other adhoc items are excluded.

 

Is it too much? Somehow I'm suspected I am contributing to the economic recovery through her spending :-(

 

[Maz0608]

Thank you bro! This broom is getting very irritating too...

 

Why the heck did I marry a S'pore girl?

 

What's wrong with marrying a Singapore girl? My wife paid for all household expenses though she earned much less than me.

I only need to pay for all expenditures related to my car.

[Donut]

man doesn't need $$ to stray lor......

 

its the techniques and suaveness of a man who will attract women... not $$....

[Donut]

wrong, my friend...

 

its "the love of money is the root of all evil".

[D3badge]

Thank you bro! This broom is getting very irritating too...

 

Why the heck did I marry a S'pore girl?

 

Bro I am sorry for your plight......

 

but not all Singapore girls that bad, yours might just be a uniquely Singaporean girl case.

 

Sorry not been mean..... but by reading your post I think I am a very lucky man than. me offer pay for my wife to go UK 10 holidays this year end, and intially she reject cause she scare I spend too much as we are getting our new apartment in 3 mths times and need to do reno.

 

show her my extra stash of cash I stash aside for the house than she ok

BTW my wife works too.

 

Bro you better talk to your wife and let her know you are STRESS. what all bros say here only a pinch of salt as you know your wife and situation best

Edited October 26, 2009 by D3badge

[Roborovskii]

Dear Lord! 8k . I assume you are the prudent type since you're in an EC, no maid(s) and only have 1 vehicle to feed. That money is better used invested elsewhere. Maybe you should ask your wife to attend some financial prudence seminar or something... my family's monthly expense is less than 1k and the rest is allocated into savings. It's really a needs versus wants situation for her i guess. A couple of hundreds here and there adds up eventually over the month.

[Drive_carcar]

if you can trust your wife & know her character well.

 

then, she may just belong to the type that does not want you to have too much money on hand to keep a mistress. won't be surprised if she runs the household

on a tight budget and have a fat retirement fund stashed in many baskets.

 

She is also may be protecting her and her children by stashing enough money for her and them to survive should you suddenly decide to divorce and married a SYT.

 

if you feel you do not have enough to spend, break down your monthly expenses and talk to her (as a couple, ideally both should be open and this question shouldn't have come about)

 

If you don't trust her. The negative thoughts many bro share liao.

 

But every home cook meal include abalone and birdnest, then you are wasting our time speculating :)

Actually come to think of it, you are probably right. Maybe I whine a bit much, although a 10% incr month is a bit siong on me. I'm not that rich, I get a decent pay, but there's only so much my salary can do.

 

I started the thread because I was so pissed off at the number, it's like she pluck it out of thin air, without thinking that I also need to have some cash in hand for my own daily expenses. It's too much to ask for me to just work and give everything I have to the family - I think Koreans are like that.

 

It's a bit tiring, always feel as if I just don't have enough for things I really like. Every month see my salary come in, feels good for about 5 mins, then have to transfer a sizable sum to her, then to parents, then set aside the rest for car expenses, leaving just enough for food for myself, and maybe once a month outing, either golf, or pub.

[Drive_carcar]

8k for a family expenses sounds like a lot based on what you described. However, does she need to support her parents (i.e. your in-laws)? Maybe they need some money but not comfortable to tell you face to face? I know my wife needs to give money to my in-laws.

 

Am also just speculating like everyone here.

Yes, she does pay a unspecified amount to her parents, so indirectly I'm supporting my in-laws as well. Further her mum has kidney failure, and may have to go for an operation. Likely I'll have to foot at least part of the bill :-(

[Drive_carcar]

You already said it.

it's ridiculous. not the amount but the rate of increase.

 

Reply that if she cannot tell you does it mean she doesnt trust you?

Both parties need to be open about it.

 

Anyway, as the man of the house, your questions on household budget is valid and should be periodically asked and fairly answered.

 

If this increase has only been happening very recently, some event must have triggered it.

You need to know what happened.

 

She could simply be saving her "si fang chian" by all means but she should still let you know.

 

Also ask yourself what you've done lately......heh.

Actually I asked her for a breakdown, end up in cold war, as she said I don't trust her.

 

One of my friend - a woman, actually adviced me to keep my own "si fang chian". Now normally women tend to take side with another woman, and this coming from a lady friend who has my interest at heart, gotta mean for something.

 

Not that I don't stash away something, I'm still aiming for an A4 or a BMW, just that from now on, I have to rein in things a bit more.

[Drive_carcar]

Tat's true...if he wanna stray, he can lo....but if he choose not to, he will not...

Frankly I wanna stray sometimes, just way too busy at work and home.

 

 

[Drive_carcar]

Its really a private issue. But you can try thinking about what are her spending habits when you used to date her. Does she tend to spend excessively on things that are intended for her own personal satisfaction?

Also, it may be a medical reason and for some reason, she chose not to tell you first. Check to see if she got any unusual habits recently. That may give you a clue.

 

Hope it end up alright :)

Dating was different. When we were dating I was a poor bloke. Now that I'm doing ok career wise, she feels entitled to everything I make.

[Drive_carcar]

just a thought from a loving wife view (IF she is):

 

Do you have saving on your own and do you spend impulsively, especially on big ticket item? woman can be either good or bad in money management. but if you are not good at it, she better be. if she is asking more for saving purpose, she is doing good for the family. imaging one day you loss your job with debt and no saving, she is able to take out few hundred k to tide things over, wouldn't you be touch?

 

but if you really know her so well that she is not saving the extras, then it's time to have a family meeting!

I used to spend impulsively, but not anymore. I like to believe she has stashed aside some money, but I have never ever seen it.

[Higgsboson]

the journey to wealth building starts with a good spouse whom stick by you in a frugal lifestyle. especially in your case where salary is the main income source. without the above, no matter how much income you have, it can be a painful journey even if there is a big windfall at some point in your life.

 

have you perform what-if scenario planning for zero income perhaps u can try to test the relationship first by indicating that your income is slash by half due to restructuring or whatsoever reason. see the reaction, followed by getting all the 8k itemized.

 

once there is a better picture, you may want to consider a trust setup if you have the certain networth or simply a will to provide the comfort feeling for her. its never too late to have a plan first.

 

personally, my burnrate is about 8-10k pm with 3k tax inclusive, 3 kids, a housewife and 2 conti. so coming from my experience wise, i can say your wife burn rate is on the extreme side. so do take care. income leakage is the first sign of financial trouble ahead.

 

[Dazzleboy]

Yes, she does pay a unspecified amount to her parents, so indirectly I'm supporting my in-laws as well. Further her mum has kidney failure, and may have to go for an operation. Likely I'll have to foot at least part of the bill :-(

 

If your wife is paying for your MIL's dialysis, that portion can come up to 4 to 5K/mth.